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The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce

A 25 Year Landmark Study

by Judith S. Wallerstein ; Sandra Blakeslee ; Julia M. Lewis

Summary

Wallerstein's 25-year study of the effects of divorce on children, including their adolescence and young adulthood, gives a unique and vivid portrait of the divorce culture. A comparative study, it sheds light on the legacy of failed marriages: attitudes, life-choices, and behaviors that children of intact homes do not harbor. Valuable reading for married couples and adult children of divorce. A New York Times Notable Book for 2000.

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Media Reviews

"Wallerstein, who believes that how and when divorcing parents break the news makes a big difference in how their children cope afterward, offers specific suggestions to couples about what they might say. Indeed, one of this book's virtues is the way it combines research and analysis with advice to real people facing the breakup of their marriages."    -- Margaret Talbot

   -- New York Times

Bibliographic Details

Publisher: Hyperion Books
Published date: 2000
Edition: 1th edition
Size: 6.25 x 9.25 inches
Weight: 1.5 pounds
Pages: 347

Publisher's Notes

Twenty-five years ago, Judith Wallerstein began talking to a group of 131 children whose parents were all going through a divorce. She asked them to tell her about the intimate details of their lives, which they did with remarkable candor. Having earned their trust, Wallerstein was rewarded with a deeply moving portrait of each of their lives as she followed them from childhood, through their adolescent struggles, and into adulthood. With The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce, Wallerstein offers us the only close-up study of divorce ever conducted -- a unique report that will change our fundamental beliefs about divorce and offer new hope for the future.
Wallerstein chooses seven children who most embody the common life experiences of the larger group and follows their lives in vivid detail through adolescence and into their love affairs, their marriage successes and failures, and parenting their own children. In Wallerstein's hands, the experiences and anxieties of this generation of children, now in their late twenties to early forties, come to life. We watch as they struggle with the fear that their relationships will fail like those of their parents. Lacking an internal template of what a successful relationship looks like, they must invent their own codes of behavior in a culture that offers many models and few guidelines. Wallerstein shows how many over-came their dread of betrayal to find loving partners and to become successful, protective parents -- and how others are still struggling to find their heart's desire without knowing why they feel so frightened. She also demonstrates their great strengths and accomplishments, as a generation of survivors who often had to raise themselves and help their parents through difficult times.
For the first time, using a comparison group of adults who grew up in the same communities, Wallerstein shows how adult children of divorce essentially view life differently from their peers raised in intact homes where parents also confronted marital difficulties but decided on balance to stay together. In this way she sheds light on the question so many parents confront -- whether to stay unhappily married or to divorce.
The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce should be essential reading for all adult children of divorce, their lovers, their partners, divorced parents or those considering divorce, judges, attorneys, and mental health professionals. Challenging some of our most cherished beliefs, this is a book that will forever alter how we think about divorce and its long-term impact on American society.

Other Editions

• Hardcover - Hyperion Books (2000) - from $1.99
• Paperback - Hyperion Books (2001) - from $5.38

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