Love in Two Languages Lessons on Mothering in a Culture of Individuality Hardback - 2001

From the publisher

Every mother agonizes over the questions: "Am I being a good mother?" "Is it okay that sometimes I feel so impatient, so unnurturing?" "Why am I doing the same things my own mother did that I said I'd never do?" In this wonderfully reassuring and illuminating book, psychologist Bonnie Ohye offers lessons for developing close, trusting relationships with our children through the power of attentive love -- a love based on truly accepting our children for the unique individuals they are. She explores such themes as how love for a child can become a preoccupation with perfection; why our culture's overemphasis on talking as an expression of love can obscure our hearing what a child needs most; and how our emergence as strong, independent women can conflict with a child's need to be dependent.

An important new voice in the literature of women's identity and motherhood, Ohye writes both as an expert in child psychology and as a mother. In each chapter, she weaves moving case studies and solid research into her vivid personal narrative. The result is both an intellectually rich and emotionally satisfying read. And as a Japanese American, Ohye brings a fresh, crosscultural perspective to this important subject. This is the book on motherhood that can speak to today's generation of women.