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With Sprinkles on Top: Everything Vanilla People and Their Kinky Partners Need to Know to Communicate, Explore, and Connect Paperback - 2023

by Stefani Goerlich


From the publisher

Winner of the AASECT Sexuality Professionals Book Award for General Audience

A sex therapist's playful, affirming, and informative guide to exploring desire differences between kinky and nonkinky, or "vanilla," partners

With Sprinkles on Top offers a positive and empowering resource for talking about and working through sexual differences--particularly between kinky and vanilla partners. With more than 80 percent of adult couples in the US reporting desire discrepancies between partners, and many people holding fantasies they don't feel comfortable sharing, With Sprinkles on Top offers much-needed support. As Dr. Stefani Goerlich makes clear--vanilla can be delicious... and so can kink! Focusing on communication and connection, this guide helps you find the sprinkles that can enhance your relationship.

With empathy and understanding, Dr. Goerlich addresses hopes and fears on both sides of a desire divide and provides shame-free guidance for relationships of different shapes and orientations. Here you'll find:

- Helpful information about BDSM and kink--what it is, its effects on relationships, what a partner's interest might imply... or not!
- Worksheets and questionnaires to help each partner explore their desires, what turns them on, when they might feel open to experimentation, and how to talk about it
- Setting boundaries--tips for feeling safe and drawing the line with care
- Guidance for staying true to yourself, satisfying your partner, and finding new delights together
- Insights and guidance on what "normal" and "kinky" actually mean, bringing imagination into the bedroom, polyamorous possibilities, and much more

As Dr. Goerlich writes, "The vanilla people that I work with tell me that they want relationships built on mutual love, respect, understanding, gentleness, and trust. Funnily enough, the kinky people I work with tell me the same thing... just that they want the 'gentleness' aspect to be negotiable." With Sprinkles on Top affirms that vanilla and kinky people can thrive together--and offers practical solutions for protecting, preserving, and strengthening your relationship.

Details

  • Title With Sprinkles on Top: Everything Vanilla People and Their Kinky Partners Need to Know to Communicate, Explore, and Connect
  • Author Stefani Goerlich
  • Binding Paperback
  • Pages 272
  • Volumes 1
  • Language ENG
  • Publisher Sounds True
  • Date 2023-10-10
  • Features Bibliography, Index
  • ISBN 9781649630346 / 1649630344
  • Weight 0.7 lbs (0.32 kg)
  • Dimensions 9.13 x 5.98 x 0.79 in (23.19 x 15.19 x 2.01 cm)
  • Library of Congress subjects Sex, Sexual excitement
  • Library of Congress Catalog Number 2022058939
  • Dewey Decimal Code 306.775

About the author

Stefani Goerlich, PhD, LMSW-Clinical, LISW, LCSW, CST, is a certified sex therapist and master social worker who specializes in working with gender, sexuality, and relationships. She is a sought-after clinical supervisor, media consultant, and conference presenter who has appeared in media ranging from CNN and the Washington Post to Cosmopolitan and Teen Vogue. She is the award-winning author of the professional books The Leather Couch and Kink-Affirming Practice.

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